Scared Poopless

I'm more than a little scared for the time when Kevin goes back to work on the 14th. I'm scared that I'll have a complete and total breakdown and simply run away screaming the second he walks in the door on the first day. I'm worried that I will screw up even further with the kids than I already have(I know I've messed them up royally so far, and I'm pretty sure we're going to run in to the same issues with Aidan going to school that we have with Caleigh as far as behaviour goes, pretty much b/c of me and my stupid behaviour).